pau1y:

Instead of doing that, we could:

• not do that

clearbay:

I LOVE ORDERING THINGS FROM ONLINE ITS LIKE SOMEONE SENT YOU A PRESENT BUT YOU SENT YOURSELF THAT PRESENT 

｡･ﾟ･ﾟʕﾟ>ᴥ<ʔ･ﾟ･｡

servant-of-the-earth:

sandandglass:

My cellphone is basically just a clock sitting in my pocket because nobody contacts me

This is the most accurate thing ever.

eracist:

I’m really good at stuff until people watch me do that stuff

sundaeflowers:

I even procrastinate on the things that I want to do.

dirktier:

list of things i need to do

• a lot

things im not doing

• any of that

broaaadbean:

who needs april fools my entire life is a joke

should i ask

why am i so attracted to old men

or should i ask

why the fuck are old men so attractive 

cnnbreaking:

when you are so desperate you go to the second page of google results